opportunity

Finding Your “No”

/ oneheart / 4 Comments

Someone said to me a long time ago that you can’t have a true “yes” until you have claimed your “no.” This makes so much sense to me now but at the time I can’t say that I fully understood it.  In my childhood I was definitely a pleaser and always looked for ways not to rock the boat. I really didn’t have an example of how to just say “no,” who did?  It seems to me that no one I knew actually felt entitled to say no so if they did have the courage to put it out there it always had an edge like it needed to be explained or defended in some way. 

What about that force that exists in each of us that either pulls us toward or repels us away that is so natural?  All living beings have it and it’s so simple and pure.  We are drawn toward or repelled away from situations, objects, foods, choices and it can go on and on. You can easily that see that babies and young children always do this quite naturally.  They instinctively  sense what is just arising within them and follow it without worrying so much about how it’s received by the world around them. 

I see this playing out so naturally in my cats for example. They move through the life as they wish without the external pressure of having to be a certain way. We accept them on their own terms and it’s one of the things that all cat owners know and love about their furry friends.  They cannot be controlled nor would a real cat person ever even try. We love them for who they are and all the while we are learning how to put our expectations, attachments and agendas aside. 

Unlike the natural world we are often taught to override our inherent internal navigation system and do the “right” thing.  As a result our pure impulses can be subtle to non existent and burried deep within.  They never completely disappear and we can learn to strengthen those neglected muscles. Our instinctive and intuitive knowing comes forward most easily when we are done looking to the outer world for our direction and we are left with no other option other than to go within.  Our innate  power and wisdom is constantly calling to us and it is there for us when we are ready.

Saying “yes” when you really feel a “no” is no way to live a life and yet so many of us are engaged in life in this way.  Feeling “no” about the work we do, “no” about our social obligations, “no” about what we require of ourselves on a daily basis. Once we begin to observe our real feelings it can seem like we are so far outside ourselves that it’s an impossible journey back to our truth.  The thing that I love about the truth is that is has a resonance not only in you but in the world as well.   Even a hard truth that rings true can be easily and seamlessly received by others.  When you are true to yourself  you are being authentic and you give whose around you the opportunity to really know you, the real you.   You no longer have to hold up the perfect lovable projected image of yourself that is exhausting.  You also give others permission to just be themselves.  Other people feel where you’re coming from and are just more comfortable and relaxed around you knowing that you will tell it like it is.   

So go ahead and give yourself the opportunity to just be yourself try saying “no” when you feel “no” and see how it goes.  I’m not promising that some people won’t resist this change in you but I guarantee you will breathe a sigh of relief, have renewed energy and invigorate your true “yes.”  The perfect gift to yourself this holiday is to just feel more comfortable in your own skin.    

The All Pervading Silence of Being

/ oneheart / 2 Comments

It is always present all around us, in us and in all living beings. In fact it can never not be present and that makes it incredibly easy to overlook. It is the backdrop of our lives, the screen that the movie of life is playing on, the canvas that gives life to a work of art.  It is so profoundly important that without it nothing would exist  and yet we overlook, skip over and ignore it. It is no fault of our own because we are not raised to have the awareness that there is something greater than the body and mind.

Like so many crucial parts of life it is easily taken for granted and not given the attention it actually deserves.  Just the fact that we wake up and experience the gift of life each day is easy to disregard while other tasks and activities steal a majority of our attention.  There is nothing wrong with this it does happen this way for most people and as we progress through life we  have the opportunity to grow, change and deepen. Then one day seemingly out of the blue we are ready to see life differently and more fully. 

Without the quiet space between words, the pauses in a piece of music or the space that naturally exists between thoughts the message would be lost.  Music, words and thoughts would be a run on of notes, words and chatter with no particular emphasis or meaning.  When we recognize this we can begin to notice the power of the silence itself. 

When we meditate a common instruction is to release the thoughts or notice your thoughts and allow them to pass.  What is there to witness a thought passing?  What is always there as the silent observer?  Your answer may be, “nothing, absolutely nothing is there.”  Your answer would be correct however it isn’t just dead space.  It is aware and happens to be conscious of absolutely everything in and around us.  It is also totally aware of our behavior, feelings and actions and is able to report on them in stunning detail.   As an example a simple inner observation may look something like this.  “I was listening to my friend talking and my mind wandered to what I was going to prepare for dinner.  I started thinking about going to the grocery store and a conversation I had earlier with my partner about cooking. Then I refocused my attention so I could concentrate on the conversation.” This is a very simplified version of something that happens constantly and is an example of our ability to watch ourselves and report on it naturally and with ease. 

So I guess my question to you is what is aware?  What would it be like to focus on the space that is allowing life to play?  Is it the same as considering a blank canvas? Does it have any discernible qualities?  When you place your attention on this space how does it feel? 

There must be a reason that spiritual practices direct us to this over and over again pointing us ever inward to our own consciousness rather than outward. 

This is a discovery in itself to become aware of being aware and it points us beyond just our personal physical and psychological self and into the realm of the non-physical self – or the space of being.  It is indescribable in words therefore we can only be pointed in the direction and the discovery has to happen within each of us. 

Once discovered or known it never can be unknown again.  You may not fully understand why this is important but without it it’s like having soup with no broth, something vital is missing.  When discovered it imbues life with a different quality and power that I won’t get into here because it is experiential and unique for each person.  You learn to rest in a deeper awareness and let life play knowing all of life flows and is held by a power greater than yourself. 

My hope is that this is me putting into words what you are already intuitively aware of.

A Nudge from the Universe

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We are timeless spiritual beings having a human experience and when we are born we are one with this.   As we grow up in our families and in the world we forget the truth of who we are.  It’s meant to be this way even though sometimes it can feel like a cruel joke.  We all always have the potential to recognize our true essence.   If you look at infants and babies it is easy to see and feel their purity and oneness with the truth. Nothing is yet obstructing it and it’s why everyone loves babies so much!

I know the word spiritual can even cause confusion.  Like spiritual people are the only ones who have access to this profound and powerful truth.  This is simply not true.  Simply put spiritual seekers often live consciously to embrace and know who they are but everyone is on the same road so to speak whether they know it or not.  It’s kind of funny like that. One thing is for sure, being conscious and open does amplify the power of your essence and your path forward.

In case you hadn’t noticed I use essence and truth interchangeably but there are many ways to refer to what I’m speaking about ~ divine essence, truth of who you are, your center, true self, source, God-self, life force and so on.  Words are inadequate when it comes to describing what I am sharing with you and words can only point you in the general direction. It’s similar to seeing a road sign with the name of a town on it. You can read the name but you can only know the town by going there and experiencing it. Life is full of pointers that our mind understands are sign posts indicating what direction to go in.  If you want ice cream don’t follow a sign that sends you to a liquor store.  Knowledge of something is helpful but when it’s discovered in an experiential way then it is transformational, life altering and unforgettable.  It’s why so many people can talk about something for a long time in therapy but suddenly the penny drops when they experience the changes in their life.  

So where am I going with this…it’s time to awaken!!  Maybe you’ve heard?  Why do I say this?  Because it’s part of human evolution.  Evolution continues not in terms of our outer appearance anymore but on the inner.  Our consciousness itself evolves and we have the potential to become more wise, compassionate and loving humans.  Not through trying harder to be a better person; these qualities arise naturally from being seated in the truth.  Evolution can’t be stopped we can only either grab ahold of it consciously or be knocked around until we wake up to the truth.  We’ve been getting  knocked pretty hard lately and a lot of people have begun looking inside, growing quickly and awakening as a result.  

If you feel intrigued by what I’m speaking of please feel free to reach out to me and I can point you in the right direction to the best of my ability.  These are definitely exciting times we are living in with tremendous opportunity to make this discovery for yourself. 

Are you being nudged by the universe?  You are now!!

Facing the Void

/ oneheart / 5 Comments

Facing the void is similar to what is referred to as a dark night of the soul. Don’t worry its not as ominous as it sounds. A dark night is generally regarded as a time of great personal challenge when everything seems to be lost.  It’s as if there is a cloud hovering over head making it feel like the sun will never shine again.    It is a time of struggle and challenge where we can feel  tested repeatedly and as soon as one lesson is learned another one arrives on its heels. It is experienced alone and often no one else can relate to what you are going through and you must continue with your usual responsibilities and daily activities.   Some people can spend much of their lives in a dark night and it is believed that these souls have incarnated to learn, grow and evolve very quickly.

“…it is believed that these souls have incarnated to learn, grow and evolve very quickly.”

I have never been alive for a time where collectively we are experiencing what I am calling facing the void.     I’m calling it this because there are certain things about this time that are very different than the afore mentioned dark  night.  Right now there is an emptiness  and uncertainty that is looming and everything has stopped.  This is a collective and personal experience and we don’t know when it will end or what our world will look like when it’s over.  Our everyday routines and jobs have evaporated or changed drastically.  The streets and highways are empty and stores and businesses are shuttered and we all know what PPE is and we are wearing it!!!

“the very nature of life is uncertain.”

I’m wondering about the benefits of facing the void.  To not know for a while.   After all when we get right down to it the very nature of life is uncertain.  We can make plans but they can be wiped away in an instant.  We don’t like to think about the fact that we are not really in control.  When we really think it through life itself is impermanent and fleeting and especially as we get older the days, weeks and months seem to fly by.  

“Sometimes I thought I would be overwhelmed by the feelings.”

Oddly, part of my spiritual path has been about contemplating death.  I know how this sounds to most people.  All I can say is that I didn’t choose it.  For  some reason having to contemplate the certainty of death was something that chose me.  Initially it was a real bummer and very scary especially as a fairly young woman but going through this has been one of my most valuable life lessons.   Some times I thought I would be overwhelmed by the feelings.  Just when I thought I couldn’t take it I would have a powerful realization or learning that would make it all worthwhile.  For me it was my long dark night and a void that I couldn’t avoid but had to go through.

“we learn how to fly.”

During this time I met a spiritual teacher, Andrew Harvey, he wrote the book and coined the phrase “Spiritual Activism”, and I asked him what to do and how to deal with the knowing that our time is limited;  that we will all come to the same demise and this is the inevitable truth.   He said to me, “you can either get lost in the sadness and depression or you can dance.”   I’ll never forget it and he pointed me to something very important.   Am I going to wallow in depression or am I going to laugh, sing and dance with whatever time I am alive?  Trusting that life is an adventure that we can not predict.  It will twist and turn and surprise us over and over again.  

 When faced with the inevitability of the unknown and we don’t have solid  ground under our feet this is when we learn how to fly.  We learn essential skills for living a truly fulfilling and happy life when we face and go through what feels like the unfaceable.  We don’t learn this when we are living out our everyday lives unchallenged and comfortable.   It’s the extraordinary challenges to our very sense of self, our security, our routines that expand our knowing of who and what we really are.   It’s true what they say, “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”  It really does and we won’t go there unless we are forced to.

We are so much more than we consciously know and life offers us a profound opportunity for this learning.  

This crisis is our once in a lifetime opportunity and I am hoping we can embrace it as the powerful teacher that it is.  

Corona virus – Spiritual update

/ oneheart / 4 Comments

The corona virus presents all of humanity with a unique spiritual opportunity. It is very important to stay informed but also to not reach the” tipping point” where you are gripped by fear.

This virus has many messages one is to stop what you are doing and become still. Unplug from your usual routine and use this time to strengthen spiritually. When do we ever all have this opportunity? Most spiritual insights and wisdom come when we are quiet and still and when we are challenged we grow the most.

When we get sick we know something is out of balance and we generally have to take some time to rebalance our system and become well. This is a global illness that is effecting many many human beings and it is time to rebalance both personally and universally.

What does this mean? It will take time to glean all the wisdom from our current situation.  If you go within rest assured you will know what you need to do to become more balanced internally and externally.

We are being asked to tend to ourselves and in so doing we are taking care of the whole of humanity. What a beautiful and timely metaphor! We may not be able to be in each others physical presence at this time but now more than ever we can see the evidence of our interconnectedness. Trust that we are in a great process of change and embrace it to the best of your ability.

Sending you all so much love!!❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️